Journal #203 – Pushing it through and re-prioritize

There are days when I actually wonder what I am doing. When I’m not careful and lose focus or lose sight of what I want to do, I actually will slip into mild depression.

Three-quarters of my day from Monday to Friday are taken up by my day job, writing codes to implement features possibly used by the customer. Yes, the customer paid my company and they paid me to do a job. And that’s all it is really about. I don’t derive any meaning or purpose from it.

With that, when I finally do get home, I get so tired that I couldn’t find any inspiration to write anything. The so-called pragmatic stuff  sucked out all my imaginative creative juices. This is why documenting my day is part of my writing to ensure consistency when it comes to writing. It’s part of maintaining a habit.

Other than my day job, I do have a side hustle, doing freelance software development too, where I am primarily maintaining and enhancing a software which I built for a company years ago. Well, that too also drain what’s left of my energy and it’s why I don’t really spent a ton of time on it. I focus implementing quick fixes and call it a day. Then I get paid for it.

But that’s not to say I shouldn’t make time for writing other stuff. I still want to write a science-fiction novel and put it out there for people to read.

So that’s what I’m going to do. I am going to reduce the amount of time I spend on consuming content and spend at least an hour to two writing chunks of that science-fiction novel after I get home from work.

All of us got the same twenty-four hours and we just got to make time to do something before we regret it.