Journal #317

It is Chinese New Year’s Eve. I want to take this chance to wish all Chinese a Happy Chinese New Year in advance.

On Chinese New year’s Eve, Chinese families will gather together to have meals, also known as Reunion Dinner.

Last night, I went to bed at around 2 am after I was done watching Hostel Part 3 on Netflix. While watching the movie, I got somewhat hungry half way through and made myself a cup of oatmeals.

At around 8am, I got up to answer a nature call with a pair of heavy eyes and went back to sleep until about 9.30. I felt much fresher and got down to catch up on some tv shows that I missed.

Throughout the morning, I actually ate a couple of snacks before having lunch at around 12pm. Then I continue to watch more shows.

But as a result of me spending so much time in front of a computer, my body is starting to ache up again. So from time to time, I had to stretch myself and move about.

While watching the shows, I actually found myself looking at typewriters online. I do want one, even if not for actual typing, I wanted to collect one.

I suppose I should go on a journey through my memory lane…

You see, while I was growing up, I found myself attracted to typing. I remember vividly that I enjoy playing on an old, non-functioning typewriter my uncle got about 20 years ago. I love the feeling of hitting away at the keys.

Then over the years, that enjoyment from hitting away at the typewriter keys evolve into something more. I found myself really enjoying writing short stories during my school (most of the time, I go out of the assignment topic) years.

I have spent time writing fan-fiction based on Command and Conquer series in those writing pads, all of which I have since thrown away as part of my minimalism lifestyle. I spent so much time writing those then until my hands develop callous that didn’t go away. I remember I had to keep trimming those harden skin layers until finally one day, the callous were gone.

I have also spent one and a half years playing text-based RPG games on some gaming forum and got to know some new people from all over. There were times when I let my emotions get away (I was young and couldn’t control those emotions), and tend to get into arguments while collaborating with those people on those games. Even now, sometimes I could lose control and let it slip.

Over the years, I progressively reduced the amount of time spent writing stories and instead focus on writing codes. To me, the actual action is the same. I’m typing out a series of characters and letters. The only difference was those characters and letters get translated into something that do something and solve problems.

Then I went back to writing again during my national service. I wrote a couple of short stories here and there. I wrote a full novel. Once university started, I went back to writing codes again.

When I finally join the workforce full-time, I continue to write code. And I did other form of writing. I wrote reports, drafting out ideas, and create documents.

Now that leads on the my next series of points that has more relevance today…

At the end of it all, what I enjoy is the process of creating stuff with words. Nothing more, nothing less. I don’t want to be in management. I don’t want to be doing other kind of work typically found in a software engineering role such as configuration or deployment. I’m perfectly fine just writing codes and creating things. I don’t mind just being a pure, full-time developer, and just earning a decent wage.

With that in mind, I also know where my unhappiness at work came from. I find myself in situations where I have to be doing other things but writing. I told my team lead that I don’t want to be doing all those installation stuff, deployment, and configuration. But then the situation was that there just isn’t enough resource to have such clear cut roles. So I have to do the work of other roles. And that’s what I have to do next week.

For now, I will just suck it up and do it. I’m not doing it for me but for my colleagues so that they can enjoy a nice Chinese New Year back home. But if I’m constantly being taken away from writing stuff, then I will have to re-evaluate.

Since it’s Chinese New Year’s Eve, most of the stores will be close. They will stay that wait until at least Saturday. I won’t be going anywhere tomorrow, so I guess I will spent my time at home to put more words on my novel. It just has to be done and not find excuses.

At about 4pm, I was done catching up on every single shows that I intend to watch. Decided not to let sitting too much kill me early, I went for a run of about 4.8km at around 5pm. In the meantime, my mom was mopping up the floor.

I had a shower after I came back and then had some snacks. I started feeling very tired for some reason and decided to take a nap, waking up only two hours later. By now, my neck and shoulders are starting to ache again. So I keep doing stretching exercise to ease the pain as much as possible.

Waited until 8.45pm before we started having our dinner. Because I was so hungry, I ate more than I usually eat for dinner.

Time seems to fly faster today. I got kind of surprise when I looked at the clock and it says 10.11pm. With nothing else going on at night, I will end the journal here.