You made a promise. It can be either to somebody else or to you. And because you didn’t want to feel like you have broken a promise, you force yourself to do something.
Maybe it’s not promise. Maybe it’s because you didn’t want to feel like you have done anything productive or useful. So you force yourself to do it.
But you just ain’t feeling it.
Just like that, you put yourself in a situation where you struggled with the mixed feelings. Feeling trapped is now the main thing.
When it came to writing, that’s how I feel. Ever since the decision to stop publishing my daily log or journal to this blog, I actually felt compelled to think of a topic to write about because I didn’t want to leave my blog empty. Sometimes, there’s really nothing on my mind to write about. Anxiety comes into play because I promised to myself that I will write everyday and it doesn’t matter what or where. It could be writing on a piece of paper or in a notebook or on my computer.
And it was through this act of forcing myself to write something for my blog that I decided to settle down on writing this piece. But it’s a fact that without a certain amount of passion and ideas, nothing good will come out of “forced labor”.
So, it’s very important that one learn to accept that it’s perfectly okay not to do anything just for one day. It’s perfectly fine to take a break from doing something because you are running a marathon, not a sprint. You don’t want to burn yourself out so early in the journey and then ruin your future.